BREAKING: Bill Clinton Taken Off Of Life Support

A nurse at Bethesda has confirmed to a reporter with the Washington Sun-Tribune that former President Bill Clinton was taken off of life support at the request of his family and isn’t expected to last the night.

Clinton, taken in earlier with mild chest pain and admitted after having a massive coronary while being examined, never regained consciousness and has been declared brain-dead.

The hospital and its staff aren’t commenting on Clintons condition and the Secret Service won’t even confirm that he’s there. Nurse Sandy Batt, however, has always been honest with us, so we’re deciding to release the news now.

Bill Clinton will be dead by morning. You heard it here first.

About Mrs Loreli Eagleton 57 Articles
Loreli Eagleton is the wife of Flagg Eagleton. She is a stay-at-home Mom of 7 who loves to make sandwiches and does what she's told -- until she doesn't!